Cream of Potato Soup

We're all home from a weekend away, and glad to be here. Evan enjoyed his trip to Grandma and Papa's house a little too much--he didn't want to get back into the routine this morning. The kid cried and carried on all the way to school, and his teachers made me leave him in a little sobbing heap on the steps. I know he'll be fine once he's in there, but it's the getting him in there that's tough.

But he did have fun this weekend--lots of playtime in the sun, a Cleveland Indians game with his Daddy and Papa, trips to the park and the batting cages. I'm sure he'd consider it an ideal weekend all around. He's getting better and better at hitting a baseball (from a tee--we're not ready for the big leagues just yet) and better and better at saying no. He's now added a "neh neh" sound when he shakes his head no. It's excellent verbalization, and yet still totally irritating when I'm trying to get him to do something.

Now I need to spend a few hours getting us back into the swing of things. I have to wash all the dirty vacation clothes, and go grocery shopping because we're out of everything (when there's no juice or bread, we're out of everything). The next two weeks are going to be pretty hectic around here, and I want to be ready.

Posted by jenny at 09:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

If it doesn't warm up soon, we're sunk. Evan's rapidly getting taller, and suddenly all of his 2T pants are too short. They still fit fine in the waist, but the legs just aren't long enough anymore. If summer gets here soon, we'll be able to start wearing last year's 2T shorts, and that will be just fine. If not, we're going to have to make the jump to 3T pants, and it will involve a lot of trickery trying to keep those up. Who are these children who fit these clothes? I can't figure it out.

I'm sorry that I don't have anything more interesting to talk about than Evan's pants size! It's been a busy week here, but somehow in all that business nothing too remarkable has happened. And that's okay by me. We have to take these quiet moments when we can get them.

Posted by jenny at 02:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Further proof that Evan isn't really three, he's actually two (I've started referring to it as "Super Two"):

No. I always thought I was lucky because we never went through the "saying no to everything" that most kids go through in their twos. Evan never talked, so the nos were not an issue. But we're getting it all now. Suddenly, Evan shakes his head "no" for everything. He refuses food, getting dressed, getting out of the car, and just about every other daily routine by vigorously shaking his head. It's infuriating! He really started doing it a lot over the weekend, and was even doing it to his SLP this morning. No no no.

The funny thing is that he's known how to shake his head for a long time. It just now that he's decided to use it constantly. Mike tried to convince him that nodding yes was just as important, but that didn't go over so well. I have a feeling that things are going to get very negative around here.

Posted by jenny at 01:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Happy 29th birthday to my dear husband and Evan's wonderful daddy. We started off the day with pancakes, and hopefully things will only improve from there. I tried to get Ev to say "Happy Birthday" this morning, but all we got was our usual "hey".

Happy birthday, Hey.

Posted by jenny at 09:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Today we're in the car, and Ev is totally rocking out to that Muppets song, "Mahna Mahna". It's good to know he has an appreciation for the classics. I also almost hit a turkey on Route 19 shortly after the song ended--gotta love northwest PA.

We were on our way to Splash Lagoon--we go maybe once a year and today was the day. We met up with Lisa and Cole when the place opened at 9, and by 9:05 the boys were in the water. They had a great time playing, and this time we even tried some of the big slides. It was a lot of fun but also totally exhausting, and by 12:30 we were getting dressed to head home. I think going there actually wears the moms out more than the kids, because Lisa and I were about ready to drop by the end of the morning. That's one of the reasons we only go once a year!

After a quick stop to see my brothers (Jerry's home from law school for the summer to work at a local firm, and Timmy had off work today) we were headed back home to Meadville. It's nice to have a quiet night in after a day like today. This weekend should be fun though--Sunday is Mike's birthday but I'm sure we'll be celebrating all weekend. Hopefully there will be a margarita involved.

Posted by jenny at 07:24 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Spring is here, all is in bloom, and all the three bears have sore throats and runny noses. It looks like Evan suffers from seasonal allergies, just like his mom and pop. We've all been feeling it this week, and I'm hoping it doesn't continue for much longer. I've already washed Evan's hoodie twice this week because he's continually wiping his nose on his sleeve.

I remarked to Mike that this is just one unfortunate side effect of Evan having us for parents. We always talk about whose nose Evan has, or eye color, or any of those other distinguishing features we inherit from our folks. But we neglect to mention all the unpleasant things he might pick up as well--like the seasonal allergies, or maybe a shellfish allergy, or perhaps he's going to be shorter than he would have liked (my fault entirely). He may need glasses, almost certainly will need orthodontics, and very possibly will stick one foot out when he stands (again, all me).

It's been fun to see him grow and change and become the person he is today. When Ev was born, everyone swore he looked just like me (which he did), but he looks more and more like Mike every day. I also happen to think he looks a lot like my brothers too. We were actually talking about this last night with Mike's friend Bryan from CET when we all went out for ice cream. He asked who Evan looked like, and we never quite know how to answer that. I guess he's a little bit of everything!

Evan's still sleeping (said ice cream run was a late night for Ev, but we both enjoyed meeting Bryan finally). I should probably try to be productive during this little bit of time. But before I go, happy wedding day to Kelly and Brandon! They're getting married this evening in South Carolina--I wish I could be there, and I will be thinking about them today and hoping everything goes well for them.

Posted by jenny at 09:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Evan's been having a great week so far. He's trying new sounds--one of his favorite things to say lately is "tud tud tud". It cracks me up because there was a stuffed mushroom named Tud at my house when we were small (I think we got the name from a library book) and I haven't thought about that in years. So Ev says "tud tud tud" and "hey" all the time. "Hey" can be an expression of excitement, but it's also his name for Mike. Mommy and Hey.

Ev's been doing well at preschool and therapy lately too. He's better about going to both, and is keeping his routines at school now without as much prompting. His turn taking has improved, as well as his attention span. With all this, I'm wishing we'd put him in school long ago--but I'm sure that a lot of it has to do with his age also. I'm glad he's getting better at all of this stuff, because it makes me feel like we made the right decisions about his schooling. It's nice to feel like we're doing something right!

In other news, we got the results from the fertility testing yesterday. I won't go into all the gory details, but I will say that there are problems with both of us that we weren't aware of. If we want to have another baby, we're going to have to go to great medical lengths to do it. Now Mike and I have to really sit down and talk about how far we want to go with this. Do we go full force into trying for a baby, or do we sit back and say if it's meant to be, it will be? Neither one of us is sure of the answer yet, but whatever we decide it's not going to be easy.

Posted by jenny at 11:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Our weekend was an eventful one, but not in the way we might have hoped. Friday found us up in Erie for further fertility testing, which I will not comment on at this time. I will say that it was uncomfortable, and hopefully we'll know something more by the end of this week. The rest of the day wasn't bad though. We took a trip down to the beach, but it was a little too windy for us. Evan couldn't believe the size of the waves and he kept getting his feet wet when he got too close to the water.

We also stopped off at Waldameer (which we were surprised to see open) and walked around there for a while. Evan is going to love it there this summer--he wanted to go on everything (including the waterslides, which he thought were regular playground slides. Big big playground slides.) Mike got a few tickets and we made a great big leap into childhood when Ev went on his first ride alone. I wish I'd had my camera. He was so excited, waving to us as he went around, and Mike and I both felt a mixture of pride and sadness watching him. He's such a big boy now, this just seals the deal.

Saturday was Mike's early 29th birthday party at Mikaele and Tim's house. This party was a little more sedate than our last one, but we still had a good time. The good old Dreamcast came out of storage for a few rounds of Soul Caliber which was a ton of fun. We had cake and cool presents too--Mike's getting all Star Wars stuff this year. He has some new action figures for his desk at work now, and the fantastic Darth Vader voice changer helmet you've all heard so much about. I think he might wear it to work today. And of course, Evan thinks it is the coolest thing ever.

After all the weekend excitement, it's almost nice to return to the routine of the week. I'm sure I won't think that in another day or so, but for now it's good. We've got a normal schedule this week, and that will keep us very busy. Not to mention Star Wars comes out this week--finally! I'll see if I can get a movie of Ev doing the Darth Vader breathing to coincide with the release of the film.

P.S. Happy birthday, Betho!

Posted by jenny at 07:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The weather's been beautiful here this week, and though today is cooler than it has been the past few days, we still are outside as much as we can be. We've been walking, and playing ball, and doing all those things that we've been dying to do through the long winter. I was shocked when we needed to put a fan in our bedroom window last night--even though it was only for one night, it's a sure sign summer's coming.

The lilacs are in full bloom here too. On our walk home from speech today, Ev and I walked past several large bushes and I drank in the scent. I love lilacs, they're my absolute favorite flower. Unfortunately, we don't have any in our yard, so I'm dying this week. I've been tempted to sneak out under cover of darkness and steal some from someone down the street--I'd love to have a big bouquet on the dining room table. I know they only last two days once they are cut, but for those two days I'm the happiest kid ever.

I've always had easy access to lilacs--my dad had some at his house, my grandmother had a giant bush in her yard, and even our old apartment in Erie had tons of lilacs in the backyard. You could open the windows when they were blooming and the whole house would smell wonderful.

One of the only nice memories I have of an ex-boyfriend involves lilacs. It was during my freshman year of college--he found out that lilacs were my favorite, so he went in some guy's yard and cut a bunch and gave them to me in the cafeteria line at dinner. Sweet, but slightly embarrassing (this was a huge bunch of lilacs on my supper tray). We broke up the next week because he made out with one of my friends, but like I said it's one of my only nice memories about him. If I leave out the making out with one of my friends part, it's kind of a romantic little story.

If you can, get out and smell the lilacs this week. They'll be gone before you know it.

Posted by jenny at 01:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

My Mother's Day was by far the best ever, thanks for asking. Mike made me breakfast, my mother visited me, we took Ev to the playground and the batting cages, I got to take a nap AND talk on the phone for an hour. Great great day.

Two funny Evan things that happened over the last couple days that I must share:

1. So Mike went out to Wal-Mart on Sunday morning around 1 to do the Mother's Day shopping (I believe he wanted to wait until SNL was over). Ev and I had been in bed for hours by that point, so Mike just went out and left a light on downstairs for his return. Imagine his surprise when he comes home to find a warm body on the couch in the living room--I think it actually scared him. It was Evan, who we assume got up from his own bed, saw the light still on and came downstairs to see what was happening. It's so strange to have a child who sleepwalks--he does stuff like this all the time, and it totally freaks me out. I fear that he will wander into town one of these nights when his subconcious figures out how to unlock the door.

2. Evan just loves Mike so much. Though he's pretty good natured about it, it just kills him when Mike goes to work every morning, and Ev spends the day eagerly awaiting his return. At about 5:20 each day, there's the beep that signals Daddy has locked the car and is approaching the house. Evan will then drop everything and run for the front door to greet his favorite guy. Heartwarming scene, right? Until this week, when one of our neighbors got a new car with a locking beep that sounds almost identical to ours. Poor Ev was fooled twice on Friday with the other horn. Both times he ran to the door to greet Daddy, and both times when he realized Daddy was not there he dissolved into a puddle of tears. It was a very traumatic day for him, and now he's overly cautious about expecting Daddy.

And now, it's peanut butter jelly time.....

Posted by jenny at 12:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Happy Mother's Day, all you mothers out there. I'm living it up today, and it feels good. I'm not sure what the day holds for us yet, but I'm almost positive it can't top yesterday.

I don't know if I dare to say it, but yesterday was a nearly perfect family day. We started out with no plans, just piled in the car with a packed diaper bag around noon and headed down the road. Our first stop was just a few miles north of here, where my brother Steven was camped with his Civil War reenactment group. They were part of a weekend-long living history. We didn't see my brother though, and did see a large amount of mud and a huge deep pond, so we didn't stay there too long. Hopefully we'll be able to catch him next time.

After that we took the long way up toward Erie, stopping for treats and some shopping along the way. We didn't find what we were looking for, so we took a ride down to the bay and then gave Ev the chance to run around at Frontier Park. We had a pleasant time there, and then decided to head to the beach for some kite flying. By then, Evan was signing that he was hungry, so we had an early dinner before going to Presque Isle to fly a kite and play baseball. We also spent a good portion of our time finding large rocks and driftwood to chuck into the lake. It was an ideal afternoon.

As the sun began setting, we worked our way back home. We were all tired and happy after a fun day together. Evan and I headed to bed early, and I think my dear husband stayed awake a little longer to play Mother's Day fairy. Today's another beautiful, sunny day for us to enjoy, and I think we're going to do just that.

Posted by jenny at 10:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I'm having kind of a down week. I'd write about why, but it seems selfish. You know what? I am going to write about why, because I hate it when people say something like that and don't tell you the rest of the story. One of my pet peeves I guess.

So we've been trying for another baby for over a year. Some people know this, some don't, but there it is. While I used to be able to get pregnant at the drop of a hat, it seems that's not the case anymore. So earlier this week I had a doctor's appointment to begin the testing to find out what the problem is. And while it will be weeks before we find out anything (if indeed there's something to find out), I'm already getting depressed about it.

I've always said to myself (and anyone that would listen) that one child is fine. I do have my hands full with Evan, and I suppose that I could be happy with where we are. But I long to be pregnant again, to have another little baby, to complete our family. And as optimistic as I've been, and as hopeful as I've been, I'm starting to think it may never happen for us. I'm more than a little sad about it.

And I'm more than a little surprised that I'm so sad. I thought I would be fine with one child. I thought it wouldn't be a big deal. I thought I would at least have the good sense to wait and see what the doctor says before jumping to a million conclusions. But here I am in the moment, and none of that is true at all. I feel sad, and angry because nothing ever is easy for us. I know I'm lucky to have the wonderful child I already have, and I feel greedy for wanting more than that. Am I an awful person for being so selfish?

Mike's been wonderful about all of this, of course. He has been so supportive, even when I know I'm getting crazy. I need to settle down, and try not to think so much about it until we know where we're headed. But that's very hard to do. There's just this question hanging over our heads, and I don't know how to work around it. Will we ever have another baby? Will I be able to accept it if we don't?

Posted by jenny at 12:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Salary.com has come up with a number that represents what a stay-at-home mom's yearly salary should be. They made a formula that uses the typical salaries of day care teachers, van drivers, housekeepers, nurses, CEOs and general maintainance workers to figure that a mom doing all these things in a 40 hour work week would earn about $43,000 per year. Add in 80 hours per week of overtime to make a hundred hour work week, and stay-at-home moms should be earning $131,471 per year. But of course, that's without benefits and a 401K plan. And not to mention we're really on call 24/7.

I'm impressed with this number, because it puts some value on what moms do every day of every year. Being a stay-at-home mom isn't considered a "real" career by so many people, and that's not really fair. Having a salary, even an imaginary one, makes one stop and think about how many hats we wear, and how much work we actually do as moms. It's tough, and it sucks when we don't get the credit we deserve.

But I'm very lucky to be able to stay home with Evan. Sure, I get frustrated sometimes (who doesn't get annoyed with their boss?) and sure, it would be nice to have two incomes so we could have some more fun money, but it's okay. I'm glad to have a husband who thought me being home with our children was as important as I did. I'm glad that I am here for Evan during his most important growing years.

Now, where's my money?

Posted by jenny at 02:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Yesterday's walk went fairly well. Though we started with cold and rain, we finished in bright sunshine, and that was very nice. Evan tried to walk for about the first mile, then plopped his butt into the stroller for the rest of the way. Five miles isn't really that long, until it's up country hills pushing a 40 pound stroller!

I heard it's snowing this morning in Erie, which did make me chuckle a bit. So far we've got sun here, but who knows if that will change. I heard it's supposed to warm up a little by the end of the week, and I'm looking forward to that. I hesitate to say that spring is finally here, because every time I do that it snows again, but it's May now! Something has to give!

This week we've got therapy, and no preschool. That's something I'm going to have to get used to, and I don't like it one bit.

Posted by jenny at 09:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)